A gloat upon a sinking boat.

I try to be a man of oath,
I try to reason true.
I try to be a man of code,
I try to see things through.

I try to be a man of will,
I try to set it straight.
I try to be proactive - still,
I try to demonstrate.

I try, and its not good enough,
I might, and might have not.
I will, but seldom willing - tough,
I least the bid forgot.

I should, but never did - and worse,
I knew the path to take.
I climb on down and lift - the hurst,
Of knowing my mistakes.

I know the fault amidst my ways,
But yet i still persist.
I suffer from my own relays,
I aim - and yet i miss.

So why, i ask, and when, i stew, will i melee the foe,
And can, i dread, pretend, i said, to see a little hope.

You cant portray a figure for the right upon the wrong,
You cant enslave a servant who has lost the will for on.
You can not brake the broken and you can not bleed the bled,
You can not mute the spoken or the thoughts they of't embed.

I curse my mind, in all its grime, in all its foul and slime,
in all its waste, its feeble taste, in all its waste of time.

I curse my weak, in all its meak, in all its passive leak,
of all its utter lack, the slack - the dormat of its peak.

I curse my lacking everything - my contribution none,
my person void of offering - the simple light of sun.

And so proceeds are cursed, rehearsed, ambitioned for the fault,
A minus - plus, devoid of fuss, expecting life to halt.
Perhaps a sorry way to see the fore - for what its worth,
But that of course, belates the choice, of mine - recall and hearth.

So lay your claim to fame in pills and status - jealousy,
And ill lay mine to cunning, brains, and craft in poetry.